Hey there, Columbus crew—

Just when you thought this city couldn’t get any weirder, the world’s largest rubber duck is paddling its way toward Ohio. “Mama Duck” stands 6 stories tall,

We’ve got a $4.2M chateau that looks like it’s hiding a secret tunnel, a sandwich pop-up with French vibes and family heart, and someone’s electric bill that could fit in your couch cushions.

Add in realistic BB guns causing not-so-realistic panic, a rooftop bar that thinks it’s in Ibiza, and BBQ so good it brought cauliflower to the dark side—and yeah, Columbus is cookin’ with events this week.

Here’s what you’re walking into:

• 🏰 A mansion with 9 fireplaces and a mortgage that costs more than your liver

• 🔫 BB guns that could trigger SWAT (and possibly your HOA)

• 🍖 Ray Ray’s new BBQ HQ, where the wings are wild and the ribs bring peace

• 💸 20 under-$10 lunches that won’t shame your bank app

• 🎤 Kevin Hart, confetti-pop Smallpools, and RendeZOO chaos

Let’s dig in:

🚨 The Headlines

🏰 Columbus Mansion Madness: “Chateau-Style” = “I Have 9 Fireplaces and No Chill”

The hottest listing in town? A 1927 Tremont Rd. behemoth that costs $4.2M (or roughly 87 years of avocado toast savings). Highlights:

• 10,463 sqft of “gracious living” (translation: You’ll need GPS to find the bathroom).

• 9 fireplaces (because nothing says Ohio summer like roasting marshmallows indoors).

• Ralph Lauren-inspired billiards room (read: Fancy pool table for your midlife crisis).

Why it’s bonkers:

• The estimated mortgage is $28,414/month—same as leasing a private jet, but with better countertops.

• Zillow description: “Merging historical architecture with modern luxury.” Translation: We added Wi-Fi and didn’t tear down the leaded glass.

→ Tour the house (or just stare at Zillow and cry).

☀️ Ohio’s Solar Surge: Sun’s Out, Savings Out

Columbus homeowners are flipping the script on AEP—literally. Noah Faust’s May electric bill? $3.59. Meanwhile, the rest of us are out here paying $200 to keep our ice cream frozen.

Hot takes:

• Switch Together, the city’s solar program, is expanding. Join the cult—er, collective—for discounts and bragging rights.

• Ohio’s now the #1 solar manufacturing hub, pumping out panels faster than influencers post sunset selfies.

• Critics say solar’s “not worth it.” Meanwhile, Noah’s over here living like Scrooge McDuck in a pool of sun-powered nickels.

→ Catch rays, not regrets.

🔫 BB Guns: When “Toy” Meets “Call the SWAT Team”

Local cops are begging parents: Stop giving kids guns that look… like guns. Recent incidents include:

• Pellet rounds shot into homes (because Home Alone was a tutorial, apparently).

• A BB gun at Westerville South High that nearly turned into a very bad day.

Key quote:
“It’s a recipe for disaster.” — Eric Delbert, L.E.P.D. Firearms (who’s seen enough replicas to fill a Call of Duty convention).

Pro tip: If it’s in a holster, it’s either a Glock or a really committed cosplay.

→ See the side-by-side (spoiler: You can’t tell the difference).

📵 Classroom Cellphone Ban: Parents Say “But What About My Kid’s TikTok SOS?”

Ohio’s bipartisan bill to ban phones in schools is advancing faster than a middle school rumor. Lawmakers call it “common sense.” Parents? Not so much.

Why it’s messy:

• 60% of Ohio schools already have phone policies (aka “Please stop filming teachers for clout”).

• Bullying horror stories: Kids getting headlocked, cyberbullied, and ghosted by schools (“We emailed… they left us on read”).

• Parents fear emergencies: “What if there’s a lockdown and little Timmy can’t tweet ‘HELP’?!”

Key quote:
“My son wrote a letter saying he fears for his safety. Now he’s scared AND phoneless?” — Parent who’s over it.

Pro tip: Banning phones is like taking candy from a baby… if the baby had a burner account and a VPN.

→ Read the drama (or just screenshot this for your group chat).

🍖 Ray Ray’s Full-Service BBQ Spot Just Opened in Marion

After years of dominating the food truck and pop-up BBQ scene, Ray Ray’s finally said “let’s go full beast mode.” Their new full-service location in Marion is housed in an 1800s downtown building—and it's doing everything.

🔥 Menu highlights:

• Beef brisket and pulled pork straight from the owner’s Granville farm

• Daily wings with 11 flavors (not just “special occasion” style)

• Cauliflower burnt ends for the veggie rebels

• Smashburgers, BBQ spaghetti balls, fried cornbread, pickle flights 🤤

Bonus: They’ve got a full-service bar. Because what pairs with ribs? Bourbon.

→ See the new BBQ temple

🌇 Astra Rooftop Replaces Lumin with Bougie Views & Fire Plates

Columbus nightlife just got a glow-up. Astra Rooftop is taking over the Lumin Sky Bar space this July—with Goodale Park views, dramatic drinks, and small plates made for sharing (or not).

Park Street’s about to glow up again. This July, Astra Rooftop opens its doors (and floor-to-ceiling windows), offering Columbus skyline views, Mediterranean-Boho vibes, and dramatic share plates that live for the ‘Gram.

Behind the bar? Hans Maggard (formerly of Michelin-recognized Suerte in Austin). Expect:

• Sensory cocktails with flair

• American-meets-European dishes with theatrical plating

• A scene that feels like Ibiza dropped into the Short North

One Hospitality is behind it (Forno, Standard Hall)—so yeah, this’ll be packed.

→ Scope the vibes

💸 5 Lunch Spots in Columbus for Under $10

Ballin’ on a budget? Here are 5+ places where a tenner gets you full and proud, without dipping into rent money.

• 💥 Hot Chicken Takeover – Two sliders + waffle fries + tea (Mon–Wed only). Bring napkins.

• 🥯 Fox’s Bagels – Vegan sausage + cheese on an everything bagel? Hits every time.

• 🍕 Mikey’s Late Night Slice – Grab the rotating “Mac & Cheezus” or go classic with mushroom + pepperoni.

• 🌮 Main Street Deli – Cuban, BLT, gourmet grilled cheese... all under $10 and made with love.

• 🥗 Brassica – Hummus + pita + crunchy toppings = elite plant-based fuel.

Friday, May 16

🎤 Kevin Hart: Acting My Age @ The Schottenstein Center

The legend himself is hitting Columbus with a set that’s half therapy session, half ab workout. Expect zero filters and all the fire.

→ Laugh 'til it hurts

🎶 Smallpools: LOVETAP! 10th Anniversary Tour @ Newport Music Hall

Indie-pop anthems, confetti vibes, and just enough nostalgia to make you scream-sing. Their biggest hits plus some surprises.

→ Sing your 2015 heart out

🍽️ 2025 North Market Apron Gala @ North Market Downtown

Columbus’ tastiest night—local chefs, endless bites, open bar, live music. Dress up, loosen your belt, and go full foodie mode.

→ Feast like royalty

Saturday, May 17

🎨 83 Underground Art Party @ 83 Gallery

Dive into a gritty, electric celebration of Columbus’s underground art scene. Expect spray cans, bold canvases, and the type of vibes that make you question your entire Pinterest board.

→ Come get weird with the art crowd

🦁 RendeZOO @ Columbus Zoo and Aquarium

It’s not every day you party with penguins and sip cocktails near kangaroos. This annual adults-only bash blends wildlife encounters, live music, and chef-made bites—all for conservation.

→ Go wild

🍷 Radio City: Pote’s Pirate Ball @ Aladdin Shrine Center

Yes, there will be pirates. Yes, there will be booze. Yes, someone’s probably showing up in a parrot costume. A fundraising gala meets cosplay fever dream.

→ Pillage the open bar

Sunday, May 18

🧑‍🎤 WHEE3TRIO ft. Gilad Hekselman @ Natalie’s Grandview

An evening of modern jazz with internationally acclaimed guitarist Gilad Hekselman. Think melodic complexity, insane improv, and candlelit cool.

→ Reserve your seat

⚽ Columbus Eagles FC vs FC Dayton @ Historic Crew Stadium

Local women’s soccer squad goes head-to-head with Dayton’s best. Come for the goals, stay for the gritty tackles and halftime vibes.

→ Grab tickets

🎬 Inside Out 2 @ The Avalon Theatre

Catch the early buzz at this special screening of Pixar’s sequel to the emotional rollercoaster that was Inside Out. Expect new characters, new feels, and that same nostalgic Pixar gut-punch.

→ Book your seat before Joy cries

Monday, May 19

🎤 Coco Jones: Why Not More? Tour @ Newport Music Hall

Grammy-nominated R&B queen Coco Jones lands in Columbus with powerhouse vocals and emotional bangers. Lady London opens.

→ Snag tickets

🎶 Savannah Conley @ Rumba Café

Indie-pop with a Southern soul—Nashville’s Savannah Conley headlines a night of heartfelt vocals and storytelling vibes, joined by Lucky Kilmartin & Little Miami.

→ Grab your ticket

💎 Make it with Mom: Earring Workshop @ Makers Social

A hands-on jewelry-making session perfect for belated Mother’s Day bonding or solo sparkle time. Tools and good vibes provided.

→ Book your spot

Tuesday, May 20

🧑‍🎨 Planter & Bouquet Workshop @ Makers Social

Turn dirt into art at this floral-meets-crafts night. Build a planter, bundle a bouquet, and leave smelling like spring.

→ Get your hands dirty

🍷 Behind the Bar: Rioja Tasting @ The Kitchen

Explore the bold reds of Rioja, Spain in a guided tasting event with food pairings. Bougie? Yes. Worth it? Also yes.

→ Reserve your glass

Wednesday, May 21

🎥 The Glass Web (1953) in 3D @ Wexner Center Film/Video Theater

Catch this noir thriller restored in all its retro glory… in 3D. Femme fatales, tangled plots, and vintage vibes in immersive format.

→ Get tickets

⚾ Columbus Clippers vs. Iowa Cubs @ Huntington Park

First pitch at 12:05 PM. Cheap tickets, ballpark dogs, and day-game sunshine—what more do you need for a midweek dopamine boost?

→ Snag a bleacher seat

🎤 Rachel Scanlon @ Funny Bone Comedy Club

One night only: podcast host and stand-up comic Rachel Scanlon brings big laughs and chaotic good vibes to Easton.

→ Get your giggle fix

Thursday, May 22

🎞️ Columbus Moving Picture Show 2025 @ Crowne Plaza Columbus North

A massive celebration of classic cinema and vintage collectibles. Think forgotten gems, retro reels, and panels with film historians.

→ Check the lineup

🖼️ Make, Do: Artist Panel @ Columbus Museum of Art

A creative convo unpacking the legacy of JB Blunk and Toshiko Takaezu. Sculptors, potters, and art nerds — this one’s for you.

→ Join the discussion for free

🎤 Angela Perley @ Ace of Cups

Columbus-native rock goddess hits the stage with her mix of Americana, folk, and fierce energy. Only a few tickets left!

→ Catch the hometown hero

📸 Picture of the Week

 “Yes, this works.”

That’s what the sticker says on this weather-worn Pepsi machine hiding in a random Grandview alley—and for years, it did. At just 65 cents a can, it became a beloved neighborhood mystery.

A relic from another time. A treasure chest filled with carbonated joy.

But thanks to one viral Reddit post, a wave of curious Columbusites went searching for this soda shrine... only to find a new note taped on the front: “Out of Order (for now)”.

That’s a wrap, Columbus.

This week gave us solar-powered smugness, $4M mansions with nine fireplaces, and a vending machine that might be haunted (but still iconic).

Seen something weird? Found a deal under $10 that doesn’t taste like despair? Hit reply—we want the tea, the chaos, and the hot lunch tips.

— Nate
Columbus Curiosity